Dee Wee (My Friend the Massive Idiot) Lyrics - Adam Sandler

1 He said he'd be here at seven

2 The clock just hit 7:22

3 It's too cold outside

4 To wait for my ride

5 Watching mama try out a new doo (Bruins)

6 He said he'd be here at seven

7 But it just hit 7:35 (already?)

8 Here in Brockton, Mass.,

9 I got my thumb in my ass

10 Mama's combing up a big beehive (Celtics)

11 Where the fuck is he?

12 Where the fuck is he?

13 The bitch doesn't even bother calling

14 Even though it's 7:44 (I fell asleep, pally)

15 I'm feeling kinda antsy

16 Mama's getting fancy

17 Slicking back a wet pompadour (Red Sox)

18 He said he'd be here at seven

19 It's closing in on 8:01 (Trimmin' the ‘stache, kid)

20 Me lookin' like a sap

21 In a wool knit cap

22 Mama's next move is a bun (fuckin' Patriots)

23 Where the fuck is he? (My pants are still in the dryer, dude)

24 Where the fuck is he? (I couldn't find my fuckin' snowboots, pal)

25 I wish I had a car (Huge, huge hangover)

26 Oh, no (Massive hailstorm, massive hailstorm, massive)

27 That stupid little punk

28 He's probably fuckin' drunk

29 I bet he drank a case

30 Wanna pop him in the face right now

31 Mama's eyebrow

32 Wicked good

33 Wicked good (Oh, GOD)

34 Wicked good

35 Wicked good (Fuck yeah)

36 Wicked good

37 Wicked good (Pisser?)

38 Well my friend is still a no-show

39 And I'm getting' fucking pissed (Why?)

40 ‘Cause I could've gone with Charlie

41 In the side of his Harley

42 Mama's on the phone with a stylist (Fuck Charlie!)

43 So I guess I ain't going out tonight

44 ‘Cause the digits say 12:09 (Shit-faced)

45 But call the operator

46 ‘Cause one perm later

47 Mama's hair sure do look fine (Heffenreffer!!!)

48 Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! My stepfather was tellin' me a wicked funny

49 joke!)

50 Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! I forgot it though…)

51 I wish I had a car

52 I wish I had a car (A cop pulled me over, buddy)

53 I wish I went with Charlie (5.2 blood level, state record)

54 I could have gone with Charlie (I'm in a wicked mess of trouble, haha!)

55 He gotta dee wee

56 He gotta dee wee

57 He gotta dee wee

58 He got a D.W.I. (Up the river [repeat 9x])